You are NOT the blame but the environment and the support system that failed you is to blame. Look around you, start making that change for your life by creating your very own support system (The Circle of family/friends that works for you), and change the environment that never served you well.
Too many of us want to hold on to things (Communities, Schools, Government agencies, People etc..) that does not served us, hoping it will get better throughout the days/weeks/years & maybe a lifetime.
It is time to let go of your fears, thinking that someday you will regret your decision for letting go the old for something new. Giving you a word of advice, if it did not work for you in over a year then it is time to let go.
Life is about the risk we take to make a better life for ourselves & regrets should be a lesson learned, NOT a lifetime of misery.
DON’T BLAME YOURSELF, JUST FIND A REMEDY